I was desperately trying to remember my old creative writing pen name last night when I hastily started my blog. All I could remember was Oscar Neon, the name of the guy that sat next to me. (His real name was Rick and I always thought he didn't look like a Rick) For some reason all I could think of was Haelie Blankenship. I knew that wasn't right... HAELIE EJYPT. Lord I just sat down and said it. Must have been the beers.
So I slept HORRIBLY last night. Maybe it was the six beers, maybe it was the fact that I woke up by myself on the couch at one in the morning. Maybe it was the anxiety of helping empty out the old house today. Maybe it was the overwhelming sense of guilt for not being more involved in my friends' new life. Maybe it was the lingering smell of poo in the house. Well, I could give you about five more maybe's, but I sense this might get old for you.
Well, maybe I don't care about you, the reader. I mean, I care about YOU, but maybe I don't care about what you think of this whole blog thing. Maybe that's what I'm really upset about.
I will often come up with these grand ideas in my head, and think, "Wouldn't it be cool to....." and then it never leaves my head. I once had a grand idea to coordinate a big surprise party for my mom's 50th birthday party. And it actually happened! It left my mind and became a reality. It was seven months of planning and worrying and preparing, and it was the best 24 hours ever.
So I'm starting to think; I should let more of these grand ideas leak out of the fantasy world that is my mind and give them the opportunity to spring to life. I always wanted to write....something....ANYTHING. I think I used to be pretty good at it. Somewhere along the line, I lost touch with that part of myself.
Now that I actually jumped off the high dive and STARTED a blog and actually EMAILED people that I care about to NOTIFY them.....AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
WTF was I thinking??
No backing out now...
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